The government recently calculated the cost of raising a child from birth to 18 and came up with $160,140.00 for a middle income family. Talk about sticker shock! That doesn’t even touch college tuition.

But $160,140 isn’t so bad if you break it down. It translates into $8,896 a year, $741.38 a month, or $171.08 a week. That’s a mere $24.24 a day! Just over a dollar an hour.

Still, you might think the best financial advice says don’t have children if you want to be “rich.” It is just the opposite.

What do your get for your $160,140?

Naming rights — First, middle, and last!

Glimpses of God everyday.

Giggles under the covers every night.

More love than your heart can hold.

Butterfly kisses and Velcro hugs.

Endless wonder over rocks, ants, clouds, and warm cookies.

A hand to hold, usually covered with jam.

A partner for blowing bubbles, flying kites, building sand castles, and skipping down the sidewalk in the pouring rain.

Someone to laugh yourself silly with no matter what the boss said or how your stocks performed that day.

For $160,140, you never have to grow up.

You get to finger-paint, carve pumpkins, play hide-and-seek, catch lightning bugs, and never stop believing in Santa Claus.

You have an excuse to keep reading the Adventures of Piglet and Pooh, watching Saturday morning cartoons, going to Disney Land, and wishing on stars.

You get to frame rainbows, hearts, and flowers under refrigerator magnets and collect spray painted noodle wreaths for Christmas, hand prints set in clay for Mother’s Day, and cards with backward letters for Father’s Day.

For $160,140, there is no greater bang for your buck.

You get to be a hero just for retrieving a Frisbee off the garage roof, taking the training wheels off the bike, removing a splinter, filling a wading pool, coaxing a wad of gum out of bangs, and coaching a baseball team that never wins but always gets treated to ice cream regardless.

You get a front row seat to history to witness the first step, first word, first bra, first date, and first time behind the wheel. You get to be immortal.

You get another branch added to your family tree, and if you’re lucky, a long list of limbs in your obituary called grandchildren.

You get an education in psychology, nursing, criminal justice, communications, and human sexuality that no college can match.

In the eyes of a child, you rank right up there with God.

You have all the power to heal a booboo, scare away the monsters under the bed, patch a broken heart, police a slumber party, ground them forever, and love them without limits, so one day they will, like you, love without counting the cost.

Enjoy!

It’s June 27^th and Marian is out tonight with her friends. I’ve spent the evening playing with my daughter Rebecca (age 6), my son Steve (age 4) and the neighborhood children. We enjoyed swings, playing catch, water balloons, etc. It’s 9:35 p.m. and after a tear is wiped, teeth are brushed, a story read, prayers shared, a hug and a kiss and the sign of the cross put on each other’s head my children are now in bed. Later that evening I say to myself: “God, it’s hard raising children and being a good father. There are so many other distractions in life. Sometimes it’s so hard to stay focused.” 

I finally settle in at 11:00 p.m. and flip on the TV to PBS. There is a tribute to Harry Chapin and Judy Collins starts to sing “The Cat’s in the Cradle” and I start to cry. I didn’t think God would answer so fast. That’s been my song ever since I came to the consciousness that I am a father of a father of a long line of fathers who never learned to father. Many times I’d be driving down the highway when that song would come on and I’d always shed a tear as I reminded myself to listen to the words. Words like “When you coming home dad?” or “Thanks for the ball, Dad, come on let’s play.” Sometimes when I call home on a Friday, near the end of the day, Steve will get on the phone and ask “when you coming home, Dad?” and I don’t respond ‘I don’t know when’. I always say “real soon and I love you.” Steve or Rebecca at times will say “come on Dad, let’s play catch.” I always hear that verse from the song saying “son not today” and I respond “sure let’s go.” 

I was reflecting back that night to a conversation with my neighbor. I said “you know, Bob, they’re only young once.” He said “Mike, I can’t believe Danny’s nine. Where have the years gone? It’s all been so fast. Where have all the years gone?” 

So I share with all of you adults, single, married, with or without children. They’re only young once so let’s enjoy our children in the community and all the other children in our lives before it’s too late.